Yes Day
It's about time I take a break from all the whining about how hard my life is and how unfair the world is and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah... I mean, all of that is true, but you can't live in Dumpsville all the time. However, in order to give the proper context to my story, I have to do just one little bit of whining. Sorry. It just has to be done.
I'm sure I've shared how much time my girls and I spend either in our car or waiting around in the town where most of our lives takes place. The back and forth trips between where we sleep and where we actually live have gotten beyond old, so a lot of times I opt to just have us camp out in my classroom, in my car, in our church kitchen, or anywhere else we can stop off and not be a burden. This takes up a lot of time. Sometimes, I feel really badly about that. My littlest girl has such a different childhood from her sisters and when I think about that I just want to cry. In fact, I did cry about it the other day. In any event, all of that waiting and driving takes up so much of our time that we really don't have time to do things like go for walks, bake cookies, paint, do puzzles, or bum around.
This weekend was a long weekend for us and, as I mentioned here, we had a rare weekend where very little was scheduled. I spent Saturday and Sunday cleaning and organizing and grocery shopping. It was so lovely. I felt like I actually sort of lived in this house for once. Today, a non-school day thanks to some long deceased Presidents, was a bonus day. All of the chores were done. No one had to be anywhere. I thought about throwing us all into the car to do something fun, but my littlest girl reminded me that we spend too much time in our car already. So, we decided to just have another day at home and I decided that it was going to be a "Yes Day."
Once upon a time, I read somewhere that we should try to say "yes" to our kids' requests for our time and energy as often as we can. That means that if they want to play a game or have me watch them play minecraft (kill.me.now) or style Barbie hair, I should try to say "yes" more than I should say "no." Well, here's a newsflash... That's not how life works, unfortunately, especially now. With so few hours spent in this house, I have that much less time to get all of the stuff done. Stuff that really can't wait. Lunches have to get packed. Chores have to be done. People have to be picked up. Dogs have to be fed. You get the drift. And, also, sometimes I kind of suck. Sometimes I don't want to do anything other than lie in my bed and mindlessly scroll through my facebook feed and marvel at all of the wonderfully happy lives my friends lead. (P.S. I'm super happy for all of you, but sometimes I just wish someone would have a disaster so I don't have to feel like such a loser). So, saying "yes" to requests for my time doesn't happen as often as it should or as often as I would like.
This has been a problem for as long as my kids were talking, probably. It's just more of a problem now because of The Circumstances. Long ago, I had decided that every once in a while, I would have a "yes day" which means that anytime my kids asked for my time or emotional energy, I would have to give it to them. The rule was that I had to say "yes" to just about anything...even if it meant I had to watch one of those stupid Disney shows (kill.me.again). The one caveat I granted myself was that I would not tell them it was a "yes day." Can you imagine the chaos that would ensue if I actually told my kids that I would do anything they asked me to do? They'd come up with all kinds of crazy shenanigans just to test me and ain't nobody wanna go down that road. So, "Yes Day" is a secret...except today it wasn't because I kept posting about it on Instagram and Facebook and Twitter with the hashtag #yesday. Don't judge me for oversharing! I was prepping for this blog post.
Anyway, today was the day. Shortly after I decided that today was "Yes Day," I sent my littlest girl a message on Instagram while lying in my cozy, cozy bed. I knew she was awake because I heard someone getting breakfast and she always gets up early. I suppose I could have gone up the stairs to talk to her, but I did mention that my bed was super cozy this morning, right? So, I sent her a message asking her what she'd like to do today and her response was "give you a makeover with my makeup." With that, "Yes Day" began.
The cool thing about this kind of activity is that I really get a glimpse of how simple and easy it is to make my kids happy. I'd guess it's the same for most people's kids. Today, "Yes Day" involved a makeover, driving to pick up cousins to hang out, baking cookies, taking a trip to the Goodwill and Target, and having a supper at home that was something they all actually liked. It meant not getting my undies in a bunch when they wanted to go for a walk in the rain or stressing that no one ate a vegetable with their lunches. It meant having a lot of fun and not feeling like such a negative Nelly all of the time. And, I hope, it showed my kids that I hear them and I see them and I love them. The bonus about this particular "Yes Day" was that I got to do the same thing for my nieces as well.
One other bonus today was that it got me out of my head and into the world a little bit. It's so easy to become preoccupied by all.of.the.things that make me lose sleep and nearly lose my mind. I need to keep thinking and mulling over and take baby steps toward action, but my mind and heart need a break and "Yes Day" was a perfect way to take that break. I was reminded about the blessings I have in my life in the form of those five precious children I got to say "yes" to today.
Next up, "Say Yes to Myself Day." That one's gonna be a little more tricky....
xoxo ~ Sara
I'm sure I've shared how much time my girls and I spend either in our car or waiting around in the town where most of our lives takes place. The back and forth trips between where we sleep and where we actually live have gotten beyond old, so a lot of times I opt to just have us camp out in my classroom, in my car, in our church kitchen, or anywhere else we can stop off and not be a burden. This takes up a lot of time. Sometimes, I feel really badly about that. My littlest girl has such a different childhood from her sisters and when I think about that I just want to cry. In fact, I did cry about it the other day. In any event, all of that waiting and driving takes up so much of our time that we really don't have time to do things like go for walks, bake cookies, paint, do puzzles, or bum around.
This weekend was a long weekend for us and, as I mentioned here, we had a rare weekend where very little was scheduled. I spent Saturday and Sunday cleaning and organizing and grocery shopping. It was so lovely. I felt like I actually sort of lived in this house for once. Today, a non-school day thanks to some long deceased Presidents, was a bonus day. All of the chores were done. No one had to be anywhere. I thought about throwing us all into the car to do something fun, but my littlest girl reminded me that we spend too much time in our car already. So, we decided to just have another day at home and I decided that it was going to be a "Yes Day."
Once upon a time, I read somewhere that we should try to say "yes" to our kids' requests for our time and energy as often as we can. That means that if they want to play a game or have me watch them play minecraft (kill.me.now) or style Barbie hair, I should try to say "yes" more than I should say "no." Well, here's a newsflash... That's not how life works, unfortunately, especially now. With so few hours spent in this house, I have that much less time to get all of the stuff done. Stuff that really can't wait. Lunches have to get packed. Chores have to be done. People have to be picked up. Dogs have to be fed. You get the drift. And, also, sometimes I kind of suck. Sometimes I don't want to do anything other than lie in my bed and mindlessly scroll through my facebook feed and marvel at all of the wonderfully happy lives my friends lead. (P.S. I'm super happy for all of you, but sometimes I just wish someone would have a disaster so I don't have to feel like such a loser). So, saying "yes" to requests for my time doesn't happen as often as it should or as often as I would like.
This has been a problem for as long as my kids were talking, probably. It's just more of a problem now because of The Circumstances. Long ago, I had decided that every once in a while, I would have a "yes day" which means that anytime my kids asked for my time or emotional energy, I would have to give it to them. The rule was that I had to say "yes" to just about anything...even if it meant I had to watch one of those stupid Disney shows (kill.me.again). The one caveat I granted myself was that I would not tell them it was a "yes day." Can you imagine the chaos that would ensue if I actually told my kids that I would do anything they asked me to do? They'd come up with all kinds of crazy shenanigans just to test me and ain't nobody wanna go down that road. So, "Yes Day" is a secret...except today it wasn't because I kept posting about it on Instagram and Facebook and Twitter with the hashtag #yesday. Don't judge me for oversharing! I was prepping for this blog post.
Anyway, today was the day. Shortly after I decided that today was "Yes Day," I sent my littlest girl a message on Instagram while lying in my cozy, cozy bed. I knew she was awake because I heard someone getting breakfast and she always gets up early. I suppose I could have gone up the stairs to talk to her, but I did mention that my bed was super cozy this morning, right? So, I sent her a message asking her what she'd like to do today and her response was "give you a makeover with my makeup." With that, "Yes Day" began.
The cool thing about this kind of activity is that I really get a glimpse of how simple and easy it is to make my kids happy. I'd guess it's the same for most people's kids. Today, "Yes Day" involved a makeover, driving to pick up cousins to hang out, baking cookies, taking a trip to the Goodwill and Target, and having a supper at home that was something they all actually liked. It meant not getting my undies in a bunch when they wanted to go for a walk in the rain or stressing that no one ate a vegetable with their lunches. It meant having a lot of fun and not feeling like such a negative Nelly all of the time. And, I hope, it showed my kids that I hear them and I see them and I love them. The bonus about this particular "Yes Day" was that I got to do the same thing for my nieces as well.
One other bonus today was that it got me out of my head and into the world a little bit. It's so easy to become preoccupied by all.of.the.things that make me lose sleep and nearly lose my mind. I need to keep thinking and mulling over and take baby steps toward action, but my mind and heart need a break and "Yes Day" was a perfect way to take that break. I was reminded about the blessings I have in my life in the form of those five precious children I got to say "yes" to today.
Next up, "Say Yes to Myself Day." That one's gonna be a little more tricky....
xoxo ~ Sara
I should give that a try someday. Might help put some things in perspective for me. Thank you for writing this and for its perfect timing as well.
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