Intervention: Social Media Style
Like many of us, I've been coping with the Pandemic by endlessly scrolling through social media to see what everyone else has to say about this global catastrophe while munching on carbohydrates and making extra trips to the liquor store. While its been fun to watch my boyfriend hone his cocktail making skills, this coping strategy has just increased my anxiety; the conspiracy theories, graduation party grievances, calls for liberation from our collective oppression, and endless headlines about death tolls, dropping social distancing grades, and inconsistent governmental leadership plunged me into the shallow end of the pool of despair. Plus, also, I now have to maintain a social distance from most of my jeans due to the excessive snacking. Rather than wading further into the deep end of this particular abyss, I had a little intervention with myself last night.
It hasn't all been the worst examples of self care during this time. I have a friend who religiously texts me in the afternoon to let me know that she's on her way for our daily walk and vent session. It is not an exaggeration to declare this a life saving measure. It might not save my life, but it almost certainly saves the lives of my family members who refuse to do things like put wrappers into the garbage, replace toilet paper rolls, or cheerfully complete their distance learning activities.
In another half-hearted attempt at being self-actualized, I've been inconsistently making friends with Vytus (yes, apparently that is an actual first name) on the Three Week Yoga Retreat. I have discovered a few abdominal muscles that were not happy to be awakened from their long slumber and don't even get my started on the torture that is the chair pose. Still, despite muscles and ligaments that have protested this new activity, I've found that the days I spend time with Vytus are better than the days I don't. My hamstrings may not agree, but when have I ever listened to my hamstrings before?
I've also been dabbling into meditation. This new practice would delight my former therapist; she often encouraged me to find time to just "be" with myself. There's a lot of people with whom I'd like to spend extra time, but, historically, I've found that I don't enjoy spending that extra time with myself. I'm sure there's something to explore there, but there's a limit we must set on introspection during global crises. In any event, I've been occasionally using the free courses on Headspace to be still and focus on breathing and, apparently, ignore all of the other thoughts that crowd my brain. Just as I suspected, I'm not "good" at meditation. However, it's long been time that I bring a growth mindset to this arena, so I've started telling myself that I'm just not good at meditation "yet."
Despite these intermittent forays into wellness, I've found myself growing increasingly discontent. I'm usually a pretty perky person who enjoys the "doing" in life; lately, however, I work and then binge on carbs and reality television. On Saturday, I woke up with grand plans and ideas for productivity and instead found myself laying on the couch while binge watching Million Dollar Homes: Los Angeles. (Sidebar: I'm definitely on the side of Josh Flagg in the Josh wars on this show; I find Josh Altman to be a bit of a jerk. I like the British guys the best of all). I don't think occasional lazy days are a bad thing at all. However, when I still had trouble experiencing even the slight sparkles of excitement on Sunday, I knew that I needed to have a little "Come to Jesus" moment with myself.
I've long known that social media is not good for me, for so many reasons. FOMO aside, it's just too easy to ignore things I truly love to scroll, scroll, scroll. It's gross, really. I'm missing out on good books, moments to actually care for my body, opportunities to connect with my family, and time to write on these pages. So, it was time for a change. My planner has a spot where you can write Daily Habits and then check off when you've done them. I've always been a fan of checklists, so this is right up my slightly Type A tendencies. Still, I knew from experience that just having a checklist is not enough to motivate me to do things I know I like to do. My new personal rule for myself is that I need to complete everything on my checklist each day BEFORE I can take even one gander at social media. I know. Hard. Core.
I think I read somewhere, once upon a time, that one should set around three goals to make them manageable. So, of course, I set five. I always like slightly unachievable plans to make myself feel even worse about myself. Because maybe one person is wondering what my daily "to do" list looks like, I'll share it here:
It hasn't all been the worst examples of self care during this time. I have a friend who religiously texts me in the afternoon to let me know that she's on her way for our daily walk and vent session. It is not an exaggeration to declare this a life saving measure. It might not save my life, but it almost certainly saves the lives of my family members who refuse to do things like put wrappers into the garbage, replace toilet paper rolls, or cheerfully complete their distance learning activities.
In another half-hearted attempt at being self-actualized, I've been inconsistently making friends with Vytus (yes, apparently that is an actual first name) on the Three Week Yoga Retreat. I have discovered a few abdominal muscles that were not happy to be awakened from their long slumber and don't even get my started on the torture that is the chair pose. Still, despite muscles and ligaments that have protested this new activity, I've found that the days I spend time with Vytus are better than the days I don't. My hamstrings may not agree, but when have I ever listened to my hamstrings before?
I've also been dabbling into meditation. This new practice would delight my former therapist; she often encouraged me to find time to just "be" with myself. There's a lot of people with whom I'd like to spend extra time, but, historically, I've found that I don't enjoy spending that extra time with myself. I'm sure there's something to explore there, but there's a limit we must set on introspection during global crises. In any event, I've been occasionally using the free courses on Headspace to be still and focus on breathing and, apparently, ignore all of the other thoughts that crowd my brain. Just as I suspected, I'm not "good" at meditation. However, it's long been time that I bring a growth mindset to this arena, so I've started telling myself that I'm just not good at meditation "yet."
Despite these intermittent forays into wellness, I've found myself growing increasingly discontent. I'm usually a pretty perky person who enjoys the "doing" in life; lately, however, I work and then binge on carbs and reality television. On Saturday, I woke up with grand plans and ideas for productivity and instead found myself laying on the couch while binge watching Million Dollar Homes: Los Angeles. (Sidebar: I'm definitely on the side of Josh Flagg in the Josh wars on this show; I find Josh Altman to be a bit of a jerk. I like the British guys the best of all). I don't think occasional lazy days are a bad thing at all. However, when I still had trouble experiencing even the slight sparkles of excitement on Sunday, I knew that I needed to have a little "Come to Jesus" moment with myself.
I've long known that social media is not good for me, for so many reasons. FOMO aside, it's just too easy to ignore things I truly love to scroll, scroll, scroll. It's gross, really. I'm missing out on good books, moments to actually care for my body, opportunities to connect with my family, and time to write on these pages. So, it was time for a change. My planner has a spot where you can write Daily Habits and then check off when you've done them. I've always been a fan of checklists, so this is right up my slightly Type A tendencies. Still, I knew from experience that just having a checklist is not enough to motivate me to do things I know I like to do. My new personal rule for myself is that I need to complete everything on my checklist each day BEFORE I can take even one gander at social media. I know. Hard. Core.
I think I read somewhere, once upon a time, that one should set around three goals to make them manageable. So, of course, I set five. I always like slightly unachievable plans to make myself feel even worse about myself. Because maybe one person is wondering what my daily "to do" list looks like, I'll share it here:
- Meditate
- Yoga
- Read
- Exercise
- Write
I'm a Glennon Doyle devotee so I've been watching her daily Morning Meetings with the fervor that a nun brings to daily mass. At one of her meetings, she addressed the aspiring writers. I've always been reluctant to use the word "writer" to describe myself. I am under no illusion that I'll ever get fame or fortune due to the words I spill onto the screen. I'm not even sure that's something to which I aspire. However, my BFF Glennon basically said that if you like to write, you are a writer. If you feel a need to capture the thoughts, feelings, and ideas that rattle around in your brain and burn within your soul with words, then you are a writer. In her early days of writing, she woke up every day and wrote for an hour. She would write whatever the spirit led her to and after an hour, she would hit "publish." Brave. Reckless. Confident. Three things I don't consider myself to be, but I'm still going to give it a try.
This is where you come in. If you don't see a daily post from me, feel free to check in because that means this plan has gone off the rails. Since I'm not allowed to check social media until after all those things are done, I won't be sharing this on Facebook until the evening, probably. But, I will be writing every morning and hitting "publish" after an hour of pecking away. If new words don't appear, please scold me.
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